40 days left

*sigh*

Dad lost his job + Parents have never saved any money
= no honeymoon + additional loan for Melissa for "educational purposes"

I have really struggled with this for multiple reasons:

1. I am angry with my parents because that have no financial common sense in them. They spend beyond their means, don't set budgets, and don't look into the future for probable expenses. Then, when those expenses come up, they act like getting a loan and depleting retirement accounts is no big deal. I'm not talking about my dad losing his job. This financial perspective should have been in place earlier than this past year.

2. Not having dealt with my parents' lack of financial common sense, Josh and I put $1,550 down on a honeymoon in February expecting to be able to pay the rest of it later on. Now, we had to forfeit $1,550 and use our saved portion for wedding expenses. To top things off, even though we will be able to pay all vendors, my parents have no idea on how to pay for even half of the reception! This mainly upsets me because THEY DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT TALKING ABOUT IT! They will not talk finances! It's like they're in denial. It just feels so selfish to me that they can't be completely honest and at the very least talk about what they're going to do and how they're going to do it! Instead they just sit there and say "We'll see."

3. My dad could have seen that he was going to lose his job but didn't take a proactive attitude to find something else when he knew that I was getting married at the end of the year! His pay had been cut multiple times and he worked for a VERY small company consisting of 5 people at the very most! Finally, after multiple pay cuts, his boss came to him and said that he wasn't able to pay him to work anymore. If you're pay was being cut multiple times, wouldn't you start looking for other opportunities when you knew you had a large event coming up?

4. In relation to the past reason: my family didn't tell me about my dad losing his job until he had already known for 3 weeks! I realize it isn't something you go up and down the street announcing to every person, but shouldn't you at least tell your immediate family? Especially your daughter who is relying on you to pay for a good portion of her wedding? Now, I'm not saying that I pushed my parents into paying and assumed they would. At the very beginning they gave me a dollar amount that they felt comfortable contributing. That dollar amount is what we based our budget on and then decided on vendors for. We have an expensive reception location because that is what we wanted to put our money into - the part that most people would remember! And now, it's coming to bite me is the butt!

My current frustration is just in general - not knowing how this wedding will be paid. We are ok on the vendors and everything else except the reception! This is stressful beyond belief! But I just do not have the energy to deal with it all and wish that my parents could just man up and stop sitting back and hoping that a bundle of cash drops miraculously from the sky!

5. Finally, I am just frustrated because I was SO looking forward to spending 5 days in Jamaica with my new husband; escaping the dreary Iowa winter and spending some true quality time away from distractions. This was so important and also something I announced to everyone I know. How do you explain this type of situation to others when they ask without lying or being insensitive to your family finance situation?

~Melissa~