*sigh*
Dad lost his job + Parents have never saved any money
= no honeymoon + additional loan for Melissa for "educational purposes"
I have really struggled with this for multiple reasons:
1. I am angry with my parents because that have no financial common sense in them. They spend beyond their means, don't set budgets, and don't look into the future for probable expenses. Then, when those expenses come up, they act like getting a loan and depleting retirement accounts is no big deal. I'm not talking about my dad losing his job. This financial perspective should have been in place earlier than this past year.
2. Not having dealt with my parents' lack of financial common sense, Josh and I put $1,550 down on a honeymoon in February expecting to be able to pay the rest of it later on. Now, we had to forfeit $1,550 and use our saved portion for wedding expenses. To top things off, even though we will be able to pay all vendors, my parents have no idea on how to pay for even half of the reception! This mainly upsets me because THEY DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT TALKING ABOUT IT! They will not talk finances! It's like they're in denial. It just feels so selfish to me that they can't be completely honest and at the very least talk about what they're going to do and how they're going to do it! Instead they just sit there and say "We'll see."
3. My dad could have seen that he was going to lose his job but didn't take a proactive attitude to find something else when he knew that I was getting married at the end of the year! His pay had been cut multiple times and he worked for a VERY small company consisting of 5 people at the very most! Finally, after multiple pay cuts, his boss came to him and said that he wasn't able to pay him to work anymore. If you're pay was being cut multiple times, wouldn't you start looking for other opportunities when you knew you had a large event coming up?
4. In relation to the past reason: my family didn't tell me about my dad losing his job until he had already known for 3 weeks! I realize it isn't something you go up and down the street announcing to every person, but shouldn't you at least tell your immediate family? Especially your daughter who is relying on you to pay for a good portion of her wedding? Now, I'm not saying that I pushed my parents into paying and assumed they would. At the very beginning they gave me a dollar amount that they felt comfortable contributing. That dollar amount is what we based our budget on and then decided on vendors for. We have an expensive reception location because that is what we wanted to put our money into - the part that most people would remember! And now, it's coming to bite me is the butt!
My current frustration is just in general - not knowing how this wedding will be paid. We are ok on the vendors and everything else except the reception! This is stressful beyond belief! But I just do not have the energy to deal with it all and wish that my parents could just man up and stop sitting back and hoping that a bundle of cash drops miraculously from the sky!
5. Finally, I am just frustrated because I was SO looking forward to spending 5 days in Jamaica with my new husband; escaping the dreary Iowa winter and spending some true quality time away from distractions. This was so important and also something I announced to everyone I know. How do you explain this type of situation to others when they ask without lying or being insensitive to your family finance situation?
~Melissa~
- intermittent realities -
Sunday, November 21
Wednesday, October 6
85
My life is insane!
I feel as if I can't catch up even if I had a whole week to do it.
First it was adjusting to the massive amount of work and studying needed for each class plus working 22 hours each week.
Then it was continuing that massive amount of necessary studying in addition to tests plus working the previously mentioned 22 hours each week.
Now, I have the necessary studying, tests, and interviews plus, yet again, the previously mentioned 22 hours of work each week.
To top it all off, my online class has a final due this week!
In good news:
I feel as if I can't catch up even if I had a whole week to do it.
First it was adjusting to the massive amount of work and studying needed for each class plus working 22 hours each week.
Then it was continuing that massive amount of necessary studying in addition to tests plus working the previously mentioned 22 hours each week.
Now, I have the necessary studying, tests, and interviews plus, yet again, the previously mentioned 22 hours of work each week.
To top it all off, my online class has a final due this week!
In good news:
- I have had two initial interviews for full-time positions starting next fall.
- I received a phone call from the first interview (22 hours after the interview began, 21 hours after the interview ended - however you want to look at it!)
- I have an office interview with them next week! :)
- For those who do not know the accounting industry, the typical process is that you do an initial interview with one person. Then, they narrow the field to who they really like. Once they have it narrowed, they invite that list of people to their office for a more extended interview including 2 meals with staff members and 3 interviews with directors, partners, and/or managers (aka the really intimidating people). After the office visits, firms typically extended offers to whom they would like to hire - hopefully ME!
- I have my first dress alteration appointment on Friday.
- I am going shopping with my sister-in-law Jen for flower girl dresses on Saturday (her eldest daughter is the flower girl).
- We have a big appointment with our reception location/caterer Saturday morning to go over A LOT of details and general items for the reception.
- I am going to look at some jewelry options Saturday at a place called Bett's Bridal Boutique in Valley Junction.
- Finally, my week is almost over and honestly, I have been wanting this literally since Sunday!
Tuesday, August 10
188 Days Later...
I have finally returned to blogging. I don't guarantee it will last.
Wedding planning is like quick sand. It looks so calm on the outside, but once you're in it - it sucks the life out of you. I always thought it would be easy. I believed that since I had been looking forward to this day for years, that I would be able to plan an event for 300 people with ease. No one ever told me that having a budget was going to cause an enormous amount of stress or that choosing December (I wanted my dream winter wedding) would be more difficult that anything. Maybe it isn't December that's making it difficult - maybe it's the fact that it is New Year's Eve!
However, the following is what we have completed:
As far as the rest of my life, I have none. I took 12 credit hours in 3 months and got a 3.84 GPA consisting of 3 A's and 1 B+. I think this was pretty impressive for going home almost every weekend except maybe one per month. I now have 2 jobs on campus not including my job as personal wedding planner. I also begin the fall semester in a week and a half with 16 credit hours. Josh and I will finally be living in the same zip code after 8 months! This will be a relief and I definitely will not be using skype every night!
Right now my life is in overdrive and every so often it gets out of control and I collapse. The goal is to minimize those collapses until January 2, 2011 when I can collapse in Jamaica with my incredible husband and set my cares assail in the Caribbean Ocean! Then 5 days later they will come back to me as we rush home to frigid weather so I can begin classes for my last semester of college EVER!
Wedding planning is like quick sand. It looks so calm on the outside, but once you're in it - it sucks the life out of you. I always thought it would be easy. I believed that since I had been looking forward to this day for years, that I would be able to plan an event for 300 people with ease. No one ever told me that having a budget was going to cause an enormous amount of stress or that choosing December (I wanted my dream winter wedding) would be more difficult that anything. Maybe it isn't December that's making it difficult - maybe it's the fact that it is New Year's Eve!
However, the following is what we have completed:
- Ceremony location
- Reception location
- Caterer for reception
- Minister for the ceremony
- Bridal party (not including ushers)
- My wedding dress
- Bridesmaids dresses
- Photographer
- Save-the-dates
- Florist is decided but not reserved
- DJ
- Memory book for a guest book
- Serving set and toasting flutes
- Cake topper
- Honeymoon including airfare - but no passports yet!
As far as the rest of my life, I have none. I took 12 credit hours in 3 months and got a 3.84 GPA consisting of 3 A's and 1 B+. I think this was pretty impressive for going home almost every weekend except maybe one per month. I now have 2 jobs on campus not including my job as personal wedding planner. I also begin the fall semester in a week and a half with 16 credit hours. Josh and I will finally be living in the same zip code after 8 months! This will be a relief and I definitely will not be using skype every night!
Right now my life is in overdrive and every so often it gets out of control and I collapse. The goal is to minimize those collapses until January 2, 2011 when I can collapse in Jamaica with my incredible husband and set my cares assail in the Caribbean Ocean! Then 5 days later they will come back to me as we rush home to frigid weather so I can begin classes for my last semester of college EVER!
Wednesday, February 3
A little late but...
Oh yeah, I'm engaged! And let me tell you -
It's amazing
Breath-taking
Sparkly
And the weirdest feeling ever! haha
I have waited 6 years for this and throughout all that time I have been looking forward to it SO much. I always thought that when/if Josh and I got engaged it would be no big deal and that I would have it all under control!
Well, I'm not stressed and as of right now - I do have it under control. BUT it is sooo weird finally saying fiance! I have caught Josh saying "girlfriend" and it's weird to say "...my fiance...!"
It's weird looking at wedding stuff and actually seriously looking at it. I've looked at wedding dresses online for years and I went and tried on dresses. Like, actually tried them on looking for one that I love.
It's just all-together weird!
And by weird I don't intend for that to be mean! It's kind of a sureal experience and surprisingly so!
Either way - I love him with all of my heart and can not wait until December 31, 2010 when I will marry him! And then 2011 will be one fantastic year!
It's amazing
Breath-taking
Sparkly
And the weirdest feeling ever! haha
I have waited 6 years for this and throughout all that time I have been looking forward to it SO much. I always thought that when/if Josh and I got engaged it would be no big deal and that I would have it all under control!
Well, I'm not stressed and as of right now - I do have it under control. BUT it is sooo weird finally saying fiance! I have caught Josh saying "girlfriend" and it's weird to say "...my fiance...!"
It's weird looking at wedding stuff and actually seriously looking at it. I've looked at wedding dresses online for years and I went and tried on dresses. Like, actually tried them on looking for one that I love.
It's just all-together weird!
And by weird I don't intend for that to be mean! It's kind of a sureal experience and surprisingly so!
Either way - I love him with all of my heart and can not wait until December 31, 2010 when I will marry him! And then 2011 will be one fantastic year!
Saturday, December 12
Sign Personal Math Audit Taxes
I hate finals...
Most of all, I hate the position I am in specifically this semester. I will be leaving UNI after finals, moving home, and doing an internship all of next semester. If there were ever a semester to leave (before graduation), this semester would be it. I'm ready to escape. I never thought I would dislike my job as an RA but this semester has proven myself to be absolutely dead wrong. BUT...I am so upset and haven't really dealt with the fact that my life is here in Cedar Falls. Josh is here, my friends are here, my freedom is here. Tera, Megan, Leslie and myself went out to Carlos for 1/2 price margaritas o Thursday. Megan gave a toast to me since it was our last Carlos night ever. Josh will be here in Cedar Falls...that's a complete mess that I probably shouldn't even get started on. But to sum it up it involves me, me driving to Cedar Falls on weekends, my parents, and Josh. Also, I will have to say goodbye to my "other boyfriend" Noah who is at the ripe old age of 6 months. And his parents who are amazing people and truly great friends of mine. But I guess that aspect resolves itself because I'll be living with them over the summer. Which brings me to my next point...I will be taking summer classes. blah. Which also means that Josh and I will be in a long distance relationship for 8 months...*sigh* We did it for my entire freshman year, but that was a long time ago and we have come so far from that. I don't know how we'll do. We kind of rely on seeing each other as a time to relax and de-stress.
This post is a big huge mess when it comes to structure...
So, on that note, good luck with finals, stay warm, and smile :)
Most of all, I hate the position I am in specifically this semester. I will be leaving UNI after finals, moving home, and doing an internship all of next semester. If there were ever a semester to leave (before graduation), this semester would be it. I'm ready to escape. I never thought I would dislike my job as an RA but this semester has proven myself to be absolutely dead wrong. BUT...I am so upset and haven't really dealt with the fact that my life is here in Cedar Falls. Josh is here, my friends are here, my freedom is here. Tera, Megan, Leslie and myself went out to Carlos for 1/2 price margaritas o Thursday. Megan gave a toast to me since it was our last Carlos night ever. Josh will be here in Cedar Falls...that's a complete mess that I probably shouldn't even get started on. But to sum it up it involves me, me driving to Cedar Falls on weekends, my parents, and Josh. Also, I will have to say goodbye to my "other boyfriend" Noah who is at the ripe old age of 6 months. And his parents who are amazing people and truly great friends of mine. But I guess that aspect resolves itself because I'll be living with them over the summer. Which brings me to my next point...I will be taking summer classes. blah. Which also means that Josh and I will be in a long distance relationship for 8 months...*sigh* We did it for my entire freshman year, but that was a long time ago and we have come so far from that. I don't know how we'll do. We kind of rely on seeing each other as a time to relax and de-stress.
This post is a big huge mess when it comes to structure...
So, on that note, good luck with finals, stay warm, and smile :)
Sunday, July 5
4th of July Weekend
I had a good weekend...the summer is flying by and I only have 1 month until I go back to school so it does kind of suck. I'm not ready for the school year at all!
Friday night was Ashley's bachelorette party. We went out to eat, opened gifts, and did a scavenger hunt. I saw one of the mom's from when I worked at Koalaty Time at Walgreens during the scavenger hunt and didn't want to continue...I just wanted to talk and catch up! :)
Saturday was the parade...Josh came with :D . Then he and I went back to his place, had Pizza Hut for lunch and then took a much needed nap! Then after our lovely nap we went to visit with Leeanne, Noah, and Kent. Noah is absolutely precious! He's so tiny and small and such a joy to hold. I've missed Leeanne so much...I really wish I was able to go down to Wichita and visit but right now just isn't the right time. After visiting Josh and I went back to his place, ate dinner, and then took off to go watch fireworks. Fireworks were nice and we were able to just sit and relax.
Today is laundry day and then I'm headed over to Josh's for the evening.
Then, the work week begins and Friday is the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner and Saturday is the wedding!
PS~ I don't know if this engagement thing is ever going to happen...with car payments, paying for his own cellphone plan, and just expenses all along the way...I don't think it can happen right now...*sigh* I just had this plan that we would get married in time for us to live together during my last year of school instead of him living separately from myself, possibly long distance (please no...)
Friday night was Ashley's bachelorette party. We went out to eat, opened gifts, and did a scavenger hunt. I saw one of the mom's from when I worked at Koalaty Time at Walgreens during the scavenger hunt and didn't want to continue...I just wanted to talk and catch up! :)
Saturday was the parade...Josh came with :D . Then he and I went back to his place, had Pizza Hut for lunch and then took a much needed nap! Then after our lovely nap we went to visit with Leeanne, Noah, and Kent. Noah is absolutely precious! He's so tiny and small and such a joy to hold. I've missed Leeanne so much...I really wish I was able to go down to Wichita and visit but right now just isn't the right time. After visiting Josh and I went back to his place, ate dinner, and then took off to go watch fireworks. Fireworks were nice and we were able to just sit and relax.
Today is laundry day and then I'm headed over to Josh's for the evening.
Then, the work week begins and Friday is the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner and Saturday is the wedding!
PS~ I don't know if this engagement thing is ever going to happen...with car payments, paying for his own cellphone plan, and just expenses all along the way...I don't think it can happen right now...*sigh* I just had this plan that we would get married in time for us to live together during my last year of school instead of him living separately from myself, possibly long distance (please no...)
Sunday, June 28
Reaction
So, this weekend was a pretty crappy weekend. I had gone tanning on Friday (after work) in order to get ready for Ashley's wedding (black dress...enough said). Austin and I were home alone so we ordered pizza in and had a pretty lazy evening. I was excited to sleep in on Saturday. So, when Saturday came around, I woke up. However, I woke up itching. When I woke up it was only from my elbows to my shoulders. As the day went on it spread over the rest of my arms. I was tired of it so I went to take a shower and hoped that it would alleviate the itching. It only got worse after I got out of the shower. I was itching all over and couldn't stop. I ended up having to take 3 benadryl tow different times in order to stop the itching!!! My mom and I figured that the tanning lotion I used (although I had used it before) caused the allergic reaction. Otherwise, nothing else fits. It couldn't have been anything I had ate because I didn't eat anything unusual. I was wearing my jean skirt (that I've worn a million times) and a t-shirt...so yeah! Now, I have had no kind of a weekend and have slept 25 hours since Friday evening!
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